Life Changes

How does a person go about making a life change? Let me do a quick flashback..

I remember a conversation that I had with my mother a long time ago. She was possibly the same age that I am not or a little older. She was telling me how she was frustrated and wished that she could do something different with her life. She was speaking about a new career. Now, my mother had a city job for as long as I could remember but she felt….unaccomplished? Or bored? I don’t know. I remember my response to her, “Well, why don’t you get a new job?” Now I think…oh from the mouths of babes. 🙂

Now I’m at the age that she was and seemingly at a similar crossroad. I realize now why she was so scared to make a change. She had a good job, she could provide for her family, and she knew what to expect every day. It is so stressful to make a life change when there are responsibilities involved. Now, I admit, my decision is a little easier for me since I don’t have children but still….changing a career or making a big move is hard. My biggest and toughest decision so far was going back to school! But anyway, I think about this story a lot because at the time, I didn’t understand. I had so many jobs by the time I was 23, that I just thought if you were tired of something, you just changed it. But I had my mom to rely on. If something didn’t work out for me, I could just go home.

Well, my mom passed away almost 10 years ago now, so making these decisions are so much harder. I can’t go home anymore. I have to live with the decisions that I make and hope for the best. I am continually questioning myself on everything. I am wondering if I am doing the right thing. How do I go about making a plan? What do I really want to do with the rest of my life? Am I having a mid-life crisis?

So here I am, on the road to some big life changes. It feels as if I’m just rolling with the punches and I had hoped I would not be doing that. I’m trying to be confident in my decisions, but I’m telling you….fear is getting the best of me. BUT….I’m still trotting on. I’m trying to face those negative and scary thoughts and just keep my goal in mind. I saw a glimpse of my dream last weekend. It was a beautiful boutique that I go in frequently, but is nearly exactly what I want. I hope I make it there.

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